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Author: Dick [Dial]
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How many times have you ever had to say,

If I needed your opinion I would have called

`Dial-a-Dickhead`.

Well now you can…. “Dial-a-Dickhead”… that is.

Every-one knows a dickhead or three, and this is the best place to discuss them.

dick·head (dkhd)

n. Vulgar Slang

An inept, foolish, or contemptible person.

Alert the world to the dickheads that we know, and save others from the pain and suffering that follows a dickhead everywhere!

You too can be alert, mostly because we need more Lerts, but never never be a dickhead.Even Jesus thinks you are a Dickhead

Acting like a dickhead only deprives a genuine dickhead of his (or her) rightful claim to their dickhead fame and misfortune!

Remember… Dickheads have rights too, but not on this planet!

Watch for our NEW section coming shortly on “Spot the Dickhead“. We are considering running online competitions where you too can actively participate in SPOT THE DICKHEAD.

NOTE: If you think you are listed here on this site, and are not all that happy about it, then simply email us with proof that you are NOT a Dickhead and we will remove your listing dickhead. If you are a dickhead, and you are not listed here, then again, simply email us with proof that you are NOT a dickhead, and we will list you for free you dickhead.

DICKHEAD HOTLINES: SMS Dickhead to +61422032109 or +61420788789

Play our Dial-A-Dickhead “Hold Music” for busy Dial-A-Dickhead phone calls.

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Jimmy Buffett
Jimmy Buffet thinks you are a dickhead too




The Curry-Cabbies are dickheads too.

Author: Dick [Dial]
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Let us never forget those well reknowned dickheads, the ethnic taxi driver. How is it that a well educated and presented teenager can fail the questions on a drivers license test??? It’s got me stuffed, when you can hail a cab, and find yourself greeted by a driver that can hardly speak any english, let alone read or write English, yet they amazingly pass not only a drivers licensing test, but also a cab drivers test as well.
You know the cabbies knowledge test where they have memorized the names of major roads, suburbs, and places of interest, and can suggest the most practical route there! These Cabbie dickheads think they can bluff us into thinking they know the best routes, but how many times have I been asked by a curry-muncher “How do I get there?” and not “Which way would be best?”
Even worse, if they are involved in a vehicle accident, they suddenly can’t speak any English at all! The Police should have the power to cancel their taxi-permit “on the spot”, on the grounds that the driver obviously did not have a sufficient grasp on the English language to have applied for it in the first place.
These dickheads are ferrying our loved ones all over the city, when they have paid a professional curry-muncher to sit the exam on their behalf! Does the government know about this scam? Sure they do, but apart from accepting a bit of “under the table cash”, they also acknowledge that there is a great shortage of taxi-drivers, as those who are not dickheads won’t work for a bowl of rice.
Now these ethnic super-dickheads have it down so pat, that Curry No1. who actually can speak a few words of english, actually has a taxi license and does the “day shift”. Then Curry No2. how speaks stuff all english other than “No Spik english” does the evening shift using Curry No1’s identity and license! when he is done, Curry No3. does the graveyard shift, again using Curry No.1 or Curry No.20’s permit.

The ID’s are shuffled around by “professional” Curries, who do nothing more than “rent out” the permits to the “No Spik Englis” munchers. This way the driving logs always show a “fresh” Curry behind the wheel. It is perfectly understandable that we have so many Curry-Cabbies, as we simply do NOT have enough 7-11’s to go around.

Imagine if every Curry-Cabbie saved up enough to open their own 7-11! There would be row upon row of 7-11’s upon every major road in every city across the globe. so why do currymunchers emigrate here??? because there are NO 7-11’s in their home country, and their taxis are drawn by water-buffalo!