31 Aug

Pride goeth before a Fall Dickhead, and your ready to tumble

Posted By: User ImageDick [Dial]  //  Category: Dial-a-Dickhead Hotlines, Dick's List of Dickheads, Dickhead Ramblings
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Well here’s an update on one of our special dickheads, previously listed here.

This “bullet proof” dickhead has nearly reached the end of his line. Thank you to all the readers who sent SMS texts to +61422032109 for this loser too by the way!

Well since Dickhead was listed here, he has unfortunately been robbed. Yes, ever so mysteriously both items he had under finance were stolen by robbers apparently. Or… could it be that he tried to do an “insurance job” on them????

This idiot dickhead files for bankruptcy, and then arranges for his gear to get stolen??? How stupid is that! Well the best part is, dickhead didn’t bother to think that his insurance company might bother to check into his claim. Yeh thats right, he just assumed they cough up the payment direct into his bank account!

Unfortunately, “Neville” the nice insurance fraud investigator has been asking around dickhead’s mates, and has discovered that this dickhead has been bragging to everyone that he was going to arrange for his things to be stolen, so he could claim the insurance. Doh…. what a dickhead. Neville the investigator has been secretly interviewing the dickheads family members and friends, and has discovered that this dickhead is buddies with another dickhead mentioned somewhere else on this site.

It turns out that dickhead no2 has been associated with many many other fake insurance claims on “stolen” motor vehicles. Poor old Neville, he is astounded at what he has uncovered, so he simply cancels dickhead number one’s claim, and hands the entire case file over to the Australian Federal Police, as it involves interstate thefts too.

So, back to Jim the number one dickhead. Here he is blissfully cruising around in a car abusing everyone, not realizing that in a few days he will be suffering from “greasy-bum” syndrome, commonly found in most prison bitches. The worst part is that when dickhead no2 finds out that dickhead no1 has narked him up, he might try to share a cell with no1, and they can both share a greasy-bum together.

There are some dickheads in this world, and then there are dickheads.

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25 Jun

Get your FREE WordPress blog here

Posted By: User ImageDick [Dial]  //  Category: Dickhead Ramblings
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OziFree is now giving away FREE WordPress blogs just like this one! The only differences are that you don’t get our fantastic dial-a-dickhead template, and you don’t get all the adverts that we have here.

The good part for those in the know, is that the blogs are hosted on Australian servers, so access for us Aussies is pretty bloody fast.

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25 Jun

Meter Readers are Dickheads

Posted By: User ImageDick [Dial]  //  Category: Dickhead Ramblings
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The other morning we get a visitor in the office. It’s the electricity company meter reader, armed with his little meter scanner.

He wondered if I could unlock our side gate so he could access the electricity meters, as he couldn’t find the catch to open the gate.

I explained to him that the gate had no lock, not even a catch, and would he mind simply pushing on it, or even pulling on it to swing it open, as it had spring-loaded auto-closing hinges.

Boy was he red-faced! What a Dickhead! I mean seriously, where the #$@& has this guy been! The gate even has a sign on it saying “Disabled Access - Push to Open” with a little picture of a wheelchair on it!

Perhaps it is time that our money-hungry electricity company began to hire disabled people to read their meters. They wouldn’t have had a problem accessing our meters, because they can READ!

So here we are trusting a guy that can’t read a sign on a gate, to accurately read our power consumption for the period, so that we can be billed accordingly! Now i am worried!

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